Iron Age Remains
Season 3, Episode 2
Air date 13 September 1992
Written by Roy Clarke
Directed by Harold Snoad
Episode guide
Early Retirement
Violet's Country Cottage
Hyacinth is expecting an invitation to the Royal Garden Party (based on Richard's lifetime devotion to the community).  She phones the Lord Chamberlain's Office, seeking information.  Having failed in that, Hyacinth decides she and Richard will enjoy searching for Iron Age remains; the pair head off into the country in exploration. However, the day takes an unexpected turn when a depressed Rose locks herself in her room and calls for the vicar.


Rose: "I'm going back to being a virgin!"

Hyacinth (on the phone with the Lord Chamberlain's Office, finding that she cannot speak to the Lord Chamberlain himself):  "Well, have you anyone else there who's important?  Someone in authority? ... Please don't trouble Her Majesty, of course."

Rose (desperate about men):  "I'm at a crossroads."

Onslow (out of beer): "You wouldn't be passing an off-licence, would you?"

Rose: "I mean, the big crossroads. Do you continue with your life or do you just give in?"

Onslow: "Could you go to the off-licence first and then struggle with your life?"